This one's a little edgy, boys and girls. It's clean, but it rags on some well-known MT figures pretty hard. All's I can say is, it's a reputation they've earned.

ZOMBIE GIRL (from "Creepy Girl" by Tom Servo, MST3K Episode 204 - "Catalina Caper")
dedicated to our own smurd, Miho's most talented fan, and to the one MT lady who's inspired more poetry than all the others combined

At YLF headquarters:
Servo: Oh, Zombie Girl... Little Zombie Girl... (sniff)
Draegos: Oh, what's wrong, Tom Servo of Mystery Science Theater 3000 fame? You look about as down as a lowly Miho-loving Necrophile can be.
Servo: Oh, it's Zombie Girl, Draeg. I just met a girl named Zombie Girl. And suddenly... I... find... (Cue music)
Bob: Uh-oh. I smell a song coming on.
Draegos: Naw, that was me, I had a chilli-burger for lunch.

(Dim Lights)

Dom's the guy who hates MT fans
Wants to kill them with his bare hands
Who in all the world would I
dare risk his wrath to see-ee?
Not Erika, nor Seraphim
Not Kimiko, Ping, or Yu-uki...
No other, the whole world wide,
than you, my lovely zo-ombie!

Zombie Girl

"Z" is for the 1960's Space Ghost villain Zorak, to symbolize your evil.
"O" is for the shape your eyes occasionally take when talking with Ping or having a heart attack in the girl's bathroom.
"M" is for the metaphysical quandary of not knowing whether you're alive or dead and why the hell you take walks through the city's drainage tunnels.
"B" is for how good you look bending over to feed change into an arcade machine.
The "I" can only be for "I love you."
And the "E" is there because if it was a "B" then it would be "Zombib Girl," and that would just be silly.

Zombie Girl

Oh, Zombie Girl, with you cocker spaniel haircut and far-too-short-to-be-socially-feasable leather miniskirt, how the pungent, decaying flesh of your pert young face sings to my soul. I am entranced by your occasionally open eyes and ambiguously-colored hair -- I mean, what is it, brown? Black? Some stupid unrealistic anime hair color like florescent purple? Oh, sure, you're not as cute as Yuki -- who the hell is? -- but the magnetic fact that I know absolutely nothing about you, your origins, or you motivations endeers you to me. I long to hold your cold, lifeless hand and walk with you through the halls of the Tokyo sewage system while you whisper cryptic hints about yourself that can be taken two different ways to me. And so, from the bottom of my heart, which would logically be the left ventrical... Well, that's assuming zombies even have hearts, otherwise, who knows? I mean, if their existance truly is sustained not by the biological process of pulminary circulation but rather some form of supernatural or even metaphysically transcendent energy state transference on a plane above or beside our common length-width-height extension of reality, then all this prose has less point than a Neil Innes song at a pep rally! But who cares? I just...




Zombie Girl
Won't you be mi-ine?
I'll write iambic pantameter
Lyric, prose, and rhy-yme
To catch your eye
so you'll be my
Zombie Girl
Before Piro

This is kind of my fare-well, everybody. The forums haven't gotten any faster for me in the last few months, and making a single post can take anywhere from ten to thirty minutes (this one took more than an hour to finally get posted, in fact) and the frustration factor's really starting to get to me; obviously, I have a bad route to the forum server. So enjoy, the first and probably only filk I've ever been moved to write.

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