Not truly filk, as it isn't a song.
But it's Christmassy, and I worked on it quite long.
And now I can't escape these couplets of rhyme.
I hope my brain ain't stuck like this for all time!
(I 'pologize if I've put words they've not said,
to users who posted their thoughts in this thread.
I needed some appropriate names, you see,
and it struck me that these people all could agree
That missing deadlines was not kosher since Fred
had taken webcomics full time on his head.)
And now is the time that I release to you
the madness that struck me last night around 2:'Twas the Night Before Update
'Twas the night before update and all 'cross the site
everybody was waiting their hopes burning bright
These fanfolk were wakeful, not snug in their beds
while visions of new comics danced in their heads
Their fingers hov'rd o'er F5 keys with care
in hopes that, next refresh, the page would be there.
And I with my browser, and coffee (decaf)
had just settled down to await the new laugh.
When in SD forums there arose such a clatter
I clicked on the thread to see what was the matter
I sprang to my keyboard, my mouse, and flatscreen
opened a new window to see what it could mean.
The monitor's glow on the top of my work
revealed the extent that I'd already shirk'd
Yet, clicking the homepage, I scrolled down so far,
to see Fred had updated his status bar.
"Status Complete" was still on 62
I knew in a moment he'd pushed back "Time due"
More rapid than eagles, complainers they came
to say, "he's a pro now, this slippage is lame!"
Here's Lowrider, Cynwash, and Vexx to chime in,
Basroil and Sabyr both say, "It's a sin!
"What good is a deadline that he can just move?
"Oh, and his art and plot need to improve!"
Since for every action, the reaction's equal
their posts brought out rabid fanboys for the sequel
So into the thread, angered forumites flew
to say, "So what? You don't like it? We do!"
And then in a twinkling, a new thread began
wond'ring if our heroes would soon leave Japan?
As I readied myself to compose a reply
Lo and behold: there came the Stick Guy!
He was rough trackball lines, from his head to his feet
And the pain that he brought us was very complete
"Two weeks' SGD strips!" he said with a laugh!
While forumites stocked up on bleach for eye-bath.
But Fred – soon he posted, and in it he said
that forumites really had nothing to dread:
"Dom's just being naughty, his own kind of fun,
torturing you since the comic's not done."
"I really am working to put something here,
You need not an SGD marathon fear!"
And from the SD rose a sigh of relief
the reign of this SGD strip would be brief.
So the forumites returned to gross speculation
as to whether PxK was doomed to frustration.
And who started the whole fanboy riot and why?
And what's with that blimp floating 'round in the sky?
Would we get a real comic, or just DPD?
And would it be worthy of loving CG?
When would Fred reveal what had happened to Ping?
or if Miho's evil as Merciless Ming?
I gave up on updates, and reading the thread,
and decided 'twas past time for me to abed.
But I saw Fred post, ere I logged off for the night:
"The new page is up. I hope it's alright."
Stop me! Before I rhyme again!! edit:
added two commas, removed an apostrophe and an unpaired parenthesis. The filk's prognosis is good - we rarely get secondary infections after operations like this. As for the filker, he seems to be responding well to medication and aggressive radiation therapy.
(and thanks for the kind words MWS!)