Crossbows, Beer and Ninjas
(to the tune of Lawyers, Guns and Money)

I went into a dance hall
Alone except for Boo,
How was I to know
It was Miho's hang-out too.

I was in the Cave of Evil,
Where zombie ravers swarmed,
Send crossbows, b33r and n1nj4s,
Man, get my ass rearmed - rask!

My l33t skillz notwithstanding,
Somehow I got ph34r,
I'm low on ammunition,
And I'm down on my b33r,
Yes I'm down on my b33r,
Well I'm down on my b33r.

Send crossbows, b33r and n1nj4s...w00t!

Now I'm fighting hordes of zombies,
I am a desperate man,
Send crossbows, b33r and n1nj4s,
The shit has hit the fan! - sw33t!

Send crossbows, b33r and n1nj4s...
Send crossbows, b33r and n1nj4s...
Send crossbows, b33r and n1nj4s...

(apologies etc)
===========================================
Lawyers, Guns and Money
Warren Zevon


I went home with the waitress
The way I always do
How was I to know
She was with the Russians, too

I was gambling in Havana
I took a little risk
Send lawyers, guns and money
Dad, get me out of this - Hah!

An innocent bystander
Somehow I got stuck
Between the rock and the hard place
And I'm down on my luck
Yes I'm down on my luck
Well I'm down on my luck

Send lawyers guns and money...

(additional verse included on the Excitable Boy cd)

Now I'm hiding in Honduras
I'm a desperate man
Send lawyers, guns and money
The shit has hit the fan

Send lawyers, guns and money...

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