I have very little explanation for this bout of insanity. My recent re-readings of some of Kipling's poems for a class seemed, for some reason, to mesh with my inner fanboy. Inspired as I have been by the poetry greats of the MT forums, in particular, smurd, with his delightful takes on Shakespeare, I decided to allow my inner fanboy free reign. This, this my friends, is the result. I'll begin with a Largo-centric rendition of Kipling's Loot the original of which can be referenced here I will not post it, as some of the language in it, acceptable in Kipling's time, is shockingly crude and loathesome today, and I do not wish to dismay some of the forum's more squeamish readers. No further delay, I am chagrined to present to you:
If you've ever captured a guarded flag heedless of the flak,
If you've ever capped the leader of the board,
If you've ever met a challenge with no fear of attack,
Then you know the joy of honour thus restored,
But the feeling must be brief, for your foes always bring grief,
For though you may divine the evil's root.
*Foghorn* Hoot! hoot!
For it is truly great when one can celebrate,
With a
*Forums* Woo! woo! Wuwu! wuwu! W00! w00! W00t! w00t! w00t!
Yeah, a w00t!
Ph34r the w00t!
That's a cry to make the to make the dead begin to scoot!
Those released from ph34rsome tome,
When you send them packing home,
Show your l33tness with a Woo! woo! Wuwu! W00t!
*Largo Fangirls* 'S right! Take that zombie! Woo! woo! Wuwu! W00t! w00t! w00t!

If you've knocked a fanboy downward when he's sneakin' for your place,
You can whip them hard and leave them in the smoke,
And you too may feel the pain when they've hacked inside your base,
Let them know you play rough when provoked!
For thus lament the lamers when they face a storied gamer,
That greatness comes easy just to some,
If you will lend me your ear, then I'm certain you'll hear,
The best of the replies that'll surely come,
*Forums* Yeah! A w00t!

Remember when outnumbered by a frenzied zombie mob,
That their strength is very often swarm alone,
And if you keep your health up while staying on the job,
Firepower will make the day your own!
For even in defeat, if you show you aren't beat,
And meet with steely gaze the looks they shoot,
If a foe still runs away, then you have saved the day,
And you're sure to feel the onset of a
*Forums* Woo! woo! Wuwu! W00t! w00t! w00t!

When at times you spy a weakness in a force that you respect,
And you may have cause to look at them askance,
Recall that one can still work with the ones that one rejects,
When the situation forces one to rely on chance,
Opportunities arise from even the darkest skies,
And you too may have the chance to get the loot,
So if you've had enough and you're forced to make things rough,
Your new authority warrants a w00t!
*Forums* Yeah a w00t!

You can make some good from chaos if you really know the way,
And can wrestle victory from things gone sour,
Recall your Great Teacher when you live that glorious day,
For you truly understand knowledge is power!
I may be misunderstood, but while the gettin's good,
There's plenty more cast here that might suit
*Foghorn* Hoot! hoot!
So here's a health to those who wear the fanboy's clothes,
May you punctuate your l33tness with a w00t!
*Forums* Yeah! A w00t!
Ph34rsome w00t!
And the glory and the honour and the loot!
Those released from twisted tome,
When you send them packing home,
*Largo Fangirls* Whip them completely with a Woo! woo! Wuwu! W00t! w00t! w00t!
Booya! Take that zombie! Woo! woo! Wuwu! W00t! w00t! w00t!

I'm truly very sorry. For my next abomination, I thought again to follow some of the delightful examples of some of my favourite bygone threads: The Slivovitz of Piney Flats, and Everybody Must Get Ownzed! I do hope to make this rather more interactive than your average fanworks post. I'm working with the well-studied Kipling classic The Female of the Species
I'll begin with my take on a few of the verses therein:

When the bishie psycho fights the machines in the street,
He continues unempeded by the actions of the l33t,
But Erika's encounter leaves suspicious broken nail,
For the female of the species is more deadly than the male.

So if you feel the bug, there's plenty more of the poem left un-defiled, and plenty more MegaTokyo to inspired the muses of the creative geniuses that crowd this forum.



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